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Deal 1169: Squeak!

Life on the bat-stretching line is not for everyone. Especially not for those with extended hearing ranges.

They squeak when stretched, you know. Terribly loudly, but mostly also terribly high-pitched.

Most people find it rather off-putting. But without stretching, bats would never be as fit for flight.

Are your bats freshly stretched?

Does your belfry need attention?

A visit from a skilled bat-stretcher will cure-all that ails.

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Deal 1161: Mr. Punch’s Lament.

I’m a big fish in a small pond, which leaves me so little to look forward to.

Every day it’s the same old grind. Yell at the wife. Get chased by the Crocodile. Chase the Baby. Avoid the Constable. Watch Judy whack anyone who displeases her. If I’m lucky, apply my slapstick to some lout.

But all in all, it is a dull life confined to the tiny stage.

No chance to exercise my art. I want to write. To publish. To be famous for something aside from slapstick and professed clumsiness.

Alas.

My lot in life is always be a puppet for the Professor.

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Deal 1095: Dark setting

No one went there. It was darker, and creepy. It was easier to just go around.

Safer too.

Everyone knew that the best poisons came from its fringe. Nightshade and death-cap mushrooms grew in the twilight near the edge, and Hemlock grew just outside the edge. No one remembered a time when it wasn’t there, looming, and yet ignored.

But those few who dared enter found in its depths a grotto, with a clear view of the sky, and just enough sunlight.