The classic poem says “And laying his finger aside of his nose, / And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose”.
Obviously Clement Clarke Moore is concealing the true signal. If the magic were that easy to invoke, just imagine what would happen if the “right jolly old elf” should happen to sneeze?
The fat man would undoubtedly levitate in all directions at once. With results that can barely be imagined. In short, the results would be catastrophic, and likely paint the insides of the fireplace if not the entire room.
Running around with a knife to your face would be safer than that!
No, the details described are clearly nonsense designed to conceal the truth.
The truth is out there.
And it does jingle.