Deal 1247 Preview

It’s a Black and White World:
butter knife and Knowledge are discussing window vs. Mirror


Deal 1236: Press conference

Ladies and gentlemen of the press, I stand before you here today to state clearly for the record that I have been falsely accused. As you know, my enemies are many, and some of them are probably in this room. Their current attack takes the form of quiet whispers questioning my sanity, claiming that I am paranoid. All the while they refuse to stand up and face me in public.

These are not the actions of people with evidence.

I am indeed sane.

Furthermore, I shouldn’t have to point out that whisperers claiming I am paranoid, distributed through anonymous channels and leaked recordings of unproven provenance and veracity actually support the idea that a healthy dose of skepticism is a good idea.

I do not go about armed. I do frequently carry a butter knife. In my day to day activity, I frequently have a slice of toast. That requires butter, and a knife to spread it. I am not armed. I am prepared.

I do not wear body armor. I do frequently wear thick sweaters. In case you haven’t noticed the obvious, it is cold recently. Sweaters are good insulation. The one I am wearing today was a gift from my mother, crocheted from the last of the wool gathered from her flock. Would they deny me a memento of my dear old mum?

I do not meet secretly with aliens. I assure you that if visited by beings from another world, the matter would not be a poorly kept secret. It would either be an extremely well kept secret, or entirely open and transparent. At least as transparent as the hulls of their supposed spacecraft. Which do not, of course, exist.

Finally, I do not consort with clowns. Let me say that I have no objection to people choosing of their own free will to wear the white face and red nose. It is not a life I would choose for myself or wish upon a close friend.

Thank you for your patience and I look forward to many future conferences to come.


Deal 1234: Bowl full of jelly

The classic poem says “And laying his finger aside of his nose, / And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose”.

Obviously Clement Clarke Moore is concealing the true signal. If the magic were that easy to invoke, just imagine what would happen if the “right jolly old elf” should happen to sneeze?

The fat man would undoubtedly levitate in all directions at once. With results that can barely be imagined. In short, the results would be catastrophic, and likely paint the insides of the fireplace if not the entire room.

Running around with a knife to your face would be safer than that!

No, the details described are clearly nonsense designed to conceal the truth.

The truth is out there.

And it does jingle.


Deal 1224: War

It is happening again. None of us are really ready. But then, when is someone really ready for a war?

We’ve been taught the needed skills. And yet, here we are again.

And somehow, I predict we will be back here again.

This time, we have warning and weapons of a sort. Not the right weapons for what we will face, but at least we have something. Last time, we had neither warning nor weapons. Our defenses were down. We had no resources to train, no plans, no contingencies. Frankly, it is a miracle that we survived.

Our historians will admit to all of this if pressed. They don’t like to talk about it ordinarily because the subject verges on disrespect for our leaders. But the disrespect is both intended and important.

We were not prepared, directly due to the actions of our leadership.

This time we are prepared.

It will not happen again.